


Last Christmas

by sirensani (lunecarree)



Series: xmas drabbles [4]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Christmas, Drunk Shenanigans, M/M, going home from uni for christmas, hongjoong is done with wooyoung and so am i, it’s not lying if you believe it yourself, san and wooyoung kissed 6 years ago and san ran away, wooyoung is totally over it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:20:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28226004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunecarree/pseuds/sirensani
Summary: There had to be some kind of law, surely, that states when someone confesses and kisses you in front of your house when you are teenagers, you don’t just move somewhere without saying anything and never explaining anything ever and then just turn up six years later and just smile at him with your beautiful smile and pretend nothing happenedSurely.or; the one where wooyoung is extremely over it, totally, completely, over it.
Relationships: Choi San/Jung Wooyoung
Series: xmas drabbles [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2041113
Comments: 2
Kudos: 56





	Last Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kuttsukiboshi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuttsukiboshi/gifts).



> this one is for my best friend and partner in crime, lizzie. thank you for listening to my daily au idea dumps here’s one that actually gets to leave the dms!! i love u a lot i hope u enjoy and (late) merry christmas
> 
> unbetad bc i never learn.

“Don’t cry you’ll make this harder for me.” 

Jiwoo slapped Wooyoung’s arm. “I’m not crying.” She wasn’t, but her eyes were watery. “I’m not sad, I’m angry at you for being a traitor.” She explained with a pout. Wooyoung rolled his eyes. 

“I really wish I could’ve stayed with you for Christmas but it would be at the expense of my life.” Wooyoung had pondered saying with his flatmate for Christmas in the city, but he had tried to mention it to his mother and was swiftly shut down with one look. 

Back to the suburbs for Christmas wasn’t really an optional activity, Wooyoung loved his family and spending Christmas with them but he would be lying if he said that going back just felt sort of weird. 

He had, like many people do, changed a lot when he went to university. A previously more introverted closeted Wooyoung was now practically the opposite of his former self. Not that he didn’t think that his childhood helped him become who he is today, he just felt more liberated in the city. 

Jiwoo sighed in understanding. “I wouldn’t want the flat to turn into a crime scene on Christmas,” Wooyoung laughed a little, this all felt very dramatic for a 2-week vacation. 

“I want text updates over break, even if it’s what you ate for your 4 pm breakfast just text me okay.” He smiled as he put on his jacket. “And Jiwoo, remember-” 

He was cut off, “Yes mother, turn off the Christmas tree lights when I go to bed blah blah blah.” Jiwoo imitated his voice as she rushed him to the door, he simply rolled his eyes at her. Jiwoo was a very great flatmate, he loved living with her but sometimes he thinks that she would forget her own head if it wasn’t screwed on. 

“What happened to the teary goodbye’s now you’re rushing me out the door?” Wooyoung scoffed in faux offence. He gasped suddenly, “Are you shoving me out to invite that girl from work over?” Jiwoo’s ears turned red and Wooyoung grinned. 

“Shut up.” Jiwoo pushed him out the door. “You are literally going to miss your train if you don’t hurry up.” Noticing the time, he realised that she was right. 

“Well shit.” He frowned at his phone. “Bye, I love you, ask the hottie out.” Were his parting words as he ran down the stairwell of their apartment complex. 

Wooyoung through some Christmas miracle did not miss his train, managing to find a spot to himself on the cramped train to nap for the 3-hour journey. Which, at the time, seemed like a great idea but in hindsight was the exact opposite. 

He was utterly exhausted when he stepped foot on the platform and this made the whole ordeal of having to make his own way home from the train station more painful. 

“What do you mean you're busy?” Wooyoung whined down the line. “Your favourite child came all the way from the capital to come to visit you for Christmas and you can’t even be bothered to pick him up from the train station?” He can hear his mother rolling her eyes on the line. 

“I’m sorry _hot-shot,_ but you arrived three days before Christmas and I have to run around this town like a headless chicken trying to sort things out for the biggest event of the year so you will just have to get a taxi or here’s an idea, walk.” Wooyoung scoffed. 

“Some fresh air would be great for you, cleanse out that polluted city air, and enjoy the scenery.” Wooyoung would rather not haul his suitcase around the narrow streets of this small town and have to awkwardly walk past every person he’s ever met. 

However, he refuses to argue about that with his mother so just grumbles an agreement before she hangs up. The first thing on his getting home to-do list was coffee. If he had to make awkward small talk with a taxi driver he was going to need a big dosage of it with a ridiculous amount of sugar in it. 

The coffee shop right outside of the station was a new addition to the town and Wooyoung didn’t really care much about it, as long as it was going to provide him with the goods. When he steps in the door he really thinks that the exhaustion must be hitting because he is definitely hallucinating. 

There was no chance that in this quiet coffee shop he stood in that behind the bar would be “Choi San.” Wooyoung’s mouth moves faster than his mind and suddenly he’s blurting it out, painfully awkward. 

The boy in question looks confused for a second but his face forms a smile in recognition soon enough and the smile pulls at Wooyoung’s heartstrings. 

_Choi San. Just as beautiful as ever._

Right before him in the flesh stood Wooyoung’s first love, gay awakening, first best friend and every other label you could think of. 

“Wooyoung!” San beamed. He looked different, sort of, he had grown a lot. He was a lot beefier than Wooyoung remembered and his hair was blond now. The smile was the same though, somethings just never change, Wooyoung muses. 

“What are you doing here?” Wooyoung tries to smile but it’s forced. That was the million-dollar question, San had moved away when they were 15. 6 years ago. Somewhere far, far away with no phone service obviously, since he had never returned any of Wooyoung’s calls. 

Wooyoung wasn’t bitter. 

That’s a lie actually, Wooyoung was very bitter.

There had to be some kind of law, surely, that states when someone confesses and kisses you in front of your house when you are teenagers, you don’t just move somewhere without saying anything and never explaining anything ever and then just turn up six years later and just smile at him with your beautiful smile and pretend nothing happened. 

Surely. 

“I was in Korea, I moved back at the start of the fall,” San explained, blissfully unaware of Wooyoung’s inner turmoil apparently. Wooyoung raised a brow, his mother definitely had to have known that and just carefully not mentioned it during their calls. 

“Interesting,” was the only response Wooyoung could muster, he was caught somewhere in between shock, rage and heartbreak. Only one of these responses felt reasonable, Wooyoung shouldn’t be angry at him, or at least not very mad at him. 

The feeling of heartbreak was ridiculous. It’s been six years, that’s a long time, Wooyoung’s seen a lot of boys during that time. None of them ran away to Korea when he confessed. Wooyoung hadn’t really forgotten San, he was pretty impossible to forget. 

Besides, it wasn’t even a real kiss. It was a peck if you could even consider it that. Meaningless. Wooyoung had done a lot more than kiss other people back in the city. 

Totally over it, over him. 

“Did you want to order something?” San asked after a moment of silence, and god Wooyoung had almost forgotten what he was here for. Coffee. 

After a relatively painless ordering process, Wooyoung finally got what he had come for and was ready to leave and go to his house, where he would camp out until it was time for him to go back to the city. And most importantly, not see Choi San ever again. 

“Wait!” He heard a shout just before he reached the door of the establishment. Wooyoung shut his eyes and took a deep breath, willing himself to not snap at the other boy who seems to very clearly not think they had ended their friendship on bad terms. 

“Yes?” He asks with a clenched jaw. The ever so polite and cheerful boy in front of him jumps back a little and Wooyoung feels a little guilty. If San had forgotten about it so should Wooyoung. 

“We should grab a coffee or something sometime.” They shouldn’t. Wooyoung had to be polite though, he was a different person now, liberated city boy Wooyoung should _not_ be hung up on this boy who he hasn’t spoken to in six years. 

“That sounds like a great idea.” That sounds like a terrible idea. “My number hasn’t changed, just text me when you’re free.” San smiled apologetically. 

“I don’t have your number anymore,” He sounds remorseful. Wooyoung chuckles bitterly, of course, he lost his number. 

Wooyoung sighs and grabs a napkin, “Do you have a pen I could use?” The blond boy looks confused. “So I can give you my number,” Wooyoung explains with raised eyebrows and thin patience. The other let out an ‘oh’ sound in realisation and takes a pen from behind the counter to let Wooyoung write out his number. 

When Wooyoung eventually makes it back to his parent’s house, his mother is there. Wooyoung scoffs, that woman must have had an ulterior motive. “You took your time.” She said, but took his bag and kissed his cheek anyway. 

Wooyoung doesn’t comment on that and just jumps straight to the point. “You failed to mention Choi San had moved back to town.” His mother smiles knowingly at him. 

“I didn’t think I had to tell you.” Wooyoung is not entirely sure what she meant by that, maybe she expected San to text Wooyoung himself, or maybe she thought that Wooyoung had no interest in hearing his name ever again. She would have been partially right with that one. 

Wooyoung thinks San is a bad idea. Reminiscent of a younger more foolish Wooyoung that the new Wooyoung was not in the mood to see make a return. 

Despite this, he still agrees to meet San for coffee on the 23rd. Wooyoung had a few days to prepare and hype himself up for this meetup, think of things to say that were polite and curious without crying about his teenage trauma. 

Instead, he just pretended it wasn’t happening in an attempt to not ruin his vacation. Thinking about San the whole time would have put Wooyoung in a bad mood and made him cranky throughout the whole ordeal. 

He spent the whole morning before the coffee not date cranky and that just made his mother cranky which was terrible for everyone. 

So to say, Wooyoung was not having a great day when he eventually ended up meeting with San that afternoon. He tried his hardest to not be rude, this was probably the last time he would have to see the boy. If he could help it anyway. He tried to urge himself to see this as closure. 

Wooyoung’s first problem of the afternoon was that San looked great, curse him. He was flawless and that goddamn smile of his just really messed with Wooyoung’s head. There was no possible way to think straight while he was smiling at him like this. Wooyoung froze when he waved at him. 

Fuck, Wooyoung knew that this was already going to be difficult but imagination just never does the real deal justice when it comes to Choi San. It was going to be hard for him to keep a clear mind. 

They got coffee from the shop and then headed to the park to walk around a bit, it was reminiscent of the good old days, Wooyoung thought bitterly to himself. Wooyoung wishes he could stop thinking about the past when he sees San, the other boy seems to have forgotten about it completely. 

“So, how have you been?” San asks, breaking the icy tension that hung in the air. Wooyoung has to remind himself to not say anything snarky, he was entirely guilty of never being able to conceal his feelings and hiding how irritable he felt around San was no exception. 

“Great, actually.” It’s technically not a lie or him bragging falsely either. Wooyoung had been doing better these past 2 years, if you just cut out his final years of high school when he cried himself to sleep every night, Wooyoung had been phenomenal. 

“What about you, how was Korea?” Wooyoung did not miss the wince when he asked. Interesting. Wooyoung figured there had to be more to San upping and leaving in the middle of the year without reason, he wasn’t sure he wanted to know though. 

“It was certainly an experience.” San chuckled and Wooyoung was really curious now, San looked almost pained at the mention of Korea. Wooyoung instinctively wanted to comfort him, tell him that it was okay. But it wasn’t. No matter what happened to San, Wooyoung still had to spend the last six years putting the pieces back together and he was not in a position to go through that again. 

Build the wall back up again. 

“I bet it was.” Wooyoung looked down to his coffee, this conversation definitely needed something a hell of a lot stronger to swallow down the bitter feeling Wooyoung was experiencing being in such close proximity to San. 

“Nothing beats home though.” San looked to Wooyoung as he spoke, Wooyoung was not sure that he liked what kind of implications came with this comment. 

_If that is the case, then why did you leave?_

“I’m not sure I can agree with that one.” Wooyoung chuckled, swiftly trying to lighten the mood or just change the direction of the conversation completely. 

“Of course, your mum said you were a big city boy now.” San teased, Wooyoung felt slight relief before he realised that this meant he had been talking to his mother about him. _That bitch._

Wooyoung rolled his eyes, “She exaggerated.” 

“You don’t even know what she said.” And Wooyoung does not need to or want to, his mother probably described every miserable moment of Wooyoung’s life post-the san disaster to him. This coffee was probably a pity date, some twisted apology, or even worse, something orchestrated by the woman herself. 

“I’ve known her my whole life I know that I should be extremely embarrassed and maybe apologising for the inconvenience.” San threw his head back in genuine laughter and the sound was so refreshing to Wooyoung’s ears. The sound filled his chest with glee, Wooyoung had always loved making San laugh and this time was no exception. 

“Don’t worry about it, I was overjoyed to hear about the horrors of your emo phase.” For a split second Wooyoung was petrified that his mother may have actually crossed the line this time before he realised the other boy was just teasing him. 

Wooyoung scoffed, “Please I rocked that phase, you should have seen my haircut. It really spiced up the family Christmas cards.” Wooyoung can’t help how his lips twitch up into a smile as San continues to laugh. 

“Maybe I’ll ask your mum for proof the next time she pops into the shop, I’m sure she has plenty of evidence floating around somewhere.” 

Wooyoung could almost feel himself forgetting their whole history as they continued to joke around like this, it was so easy to slip back into old habits. 

It was fine though, they could have this one afternoon like this and then return to their lives without mentioning their history or having to see each other frequently. 

Wooyoung was fine with this. 

Or he was. 

They continued on like this, Wooyoung finding a home in San like nothing had happened at all and the idea that after this he would rarely see him and have to go back to life as normal became a hard pill to swallow. 

And if Wooyoung walked a little slower to buy a little more time with the other boy, it was nobody’s business. 

San offered to walk Wooyoung home, and it became very apparent that both parties were not ready for this afternoon to end. It was just so _nice._ The whole situation was so comfortable and familiar, Wooyoung hadn’t felt so at home in a long time.

This meetup was a mistake, Wooyoung realised this halfway through the ordeal when he realised that he would probably spend the rest of the year having to get over his resurfaced attraction to the other boy.

It only took him about half an hour of joking around with him for Wooyoung to fall for him all over again. He wishes he had more self-control but Choi San was just always going to be his kryptonite and there is nothing he could ever do about it. 

“Are you still going to be here for New Years?” They had reached the top of Wooyoung’s street, San’s old street, and they were walking ridiculously slow. The conversation had died out at this point and Wooyoung was too busy lost in his own head to try and think of a way to revive it. 

They were outside his house at this point so Wooyoung hummed his yes. 

“There’s this New Years party, some guy from our English class is hosting it.” Wooyoung notices how he says ‘our’. “You should come.”. 

Now that would be a very bad idea, “Of course he will.” And it wasn’t Wooyoung who answered but his mother instead. Wooyoung curses through a forced grin. “It would be sad for him to spend the New Years holiday inside with his lame parents, wouldn’t it San?” His mother continues, to add insult to injury. 

“I’m sure that you guys would be very fun to hang around.” San politely reassures, and Wooyoung has half the mind to warn him that he might end up being invited to spend the new years with his parents if he isn’t careful. 

“You’re too sweet,” Wooyoung scoffs at his mother, reasonably fed up with her speaking to Wooyoung’s friend persona. 

“I’ll text you.” Wooyoung tries to cut this conversation short, he had no intentions of texting the other or even keeping the other’s number in his phone. 

After they say their goodbyes and San (finally) walks off, Wooyoung’s mother hits him with her glove. “Ouch,” Wooyoung exclaims while rubbing the spot she had hit. “What was that for?” He whined. 

“I didn’t raise you to be so rude,” His mother slapped the glove over his arm one more time, “That poor boy moved back here, alone might I add, and has been nothing but nice to you and you’re being rude.” 

“Yeah, well maybe you don’t know the full story.” Wooyoung feels his anger rise, “Have you considered the possibility that maybe there is a reason that I’m acting the way I am, and it’s not just because I’m a brat.” The woman looked shocked at his outburst. 

“Maybe, you should think before you blindly support someone who isn't your son.” And Wooyoung regrets it right after, but he storms off. 

Hours later, Wooyoung’s pity party was interrupted by his mother knocking at the door. “No,” Wooyoung shouts from his spot on the bed, facing away from the bed. 

His mother either does not hear him or decides to ignore him because no longer than five seconds later, the door opens and she walks in. “Hey,” Wooyoung doesn’t turn around even after she speaks. “I brought cookies,”

Wooyoung scoffs, still not turning around, “You can’t buy my love with cookies.” It pained him to say it, those were some pretty magical cookies. But Wooyoung’s pride came before Wooyoung’s need for cookies. 

“I know,” his mother sighs, “I want to apologise to you, sincerely.” Wooyoung still doesn’t budge. “I- I was wrong, I shouldn’t have presumed you were the problem and should have asked you why you were shutting him out instead of accusing you.” 

Wooyoung hums, asking her to continue. “So, I’m sorry.” 

Wooyoung honestly could not be bothered to hold a grudge at his mother for any longer, especially because those cookies smelt really good and he was kind of hungry, so he sighs dramatically. “I guess I can find it in my heart to forgive you.” 

She rolls her eyes at him when he finally turns to face her and puts a hand out for the plate. “So generous of you.” Wooyoung smiled at her and then stuck his tongue out, like a child. 

After that conversation with his mother, Wooyoung really thought that would be the end of it. Luck is apparently not on his side this festive period because a few days later he makes the fatal mistake of joining his mother on a shopping trip. Which results in him running into San, quite literally. 

The milk in his hands drops to the floor and they both curse at the same time as the liquid spills across the floor. “Well, when I said I was hoping to run into you I didn’t mean in the literal sense,” San joked. Wooyoung laughed dryly, how perfect. 

This is what he gets for not texting him back, he supposes. “Well, fate is funny that way.” Wooyoung realises as soon as he is finished speaking that he fucked up, _fate?_

“Must be.” Wooyoung smiles awkwardly and apologises to the store clerk who comes over to clean up the mess they had made. “So, you didn’t text.” San confronts, and Wooyoung is caught off-guard for a second, never had he known Choi San to be so forward about things. 

“Ah,” Wooyoung couldn’t really tell him that he had no plans of speaking or seeing him ever again, “I was really busy with the whole, uh, Christmas thing,” He stumbles clumsily over an excuse. 

“I get it,” San honestly does not look like he gets it, at all. In fact, he looks kind of upset. It hurts Wooyoung, and Wooyoung hates how much it hurts him. 

“San-” Wooyoung starts but is promptly cut off. 

“No, it’s okay I get it.” He forces a smile and Wooyoung wishes he had texted him about a hundred messages so he could have prevented this look on his face, so he could prevent hurting the other. “You don’t want to talk to me, I deserve that. I was a real dick to you in the past and it was really stupid of me to think I could waltz back into your life and pretend it didn’t happen.” 

Wooyoung had imagined this conversation a little differently, definitely not over spilt milk in aisle 4 of their local supermarket. 

“Certainly not without apologising,” Wooyoung just stares, a little horrified at the other man. “So, I am sorry for running off after you kissed me, I am sorry for not answering your texts or your calls and just never remaining in contact.” Wooyoung couldn’t muster up any words. 

“Most of all, I am sorry I didn’t kiss you back or kiss you first even.” Wooyoung’s jaw physically drops. “I am sorry I didn’t tell you I loved you too when I did.” 

They must look like idiots, standing next to the store clerk who is cleaning up the milk painfully slowly actually. Wooyoung stood there with his jaw open and San- _wait, is he crying?_

At this moment Wooyoung realises that he needs to say something, and very soon. “I think,” He breathes deeply, “I think I need to go find my mother.” His smart-ass response, San had just bared his heart to him and all he could think to do was run back to his mum. 

How ironic. 

Wooyoung runs off. 

This leaves him with a very heavy conscience though, his head is haunted by the memories of San’s face in the dairy aisle when he was confessing his love to him, or his old love to him, Wooyoung couldn’t be sure. 

What he was sure of though is that he is a grade-A jerk for doing to him what he had been crying over for the past 6 years. It didn’t feel like he had gotten revenge or anything like that, he just felt guilty. 

That guilt led him to Kim Hongjoong’s New Year party on the 31st, determined to either apologise or get really, _really_ drunk. 

“Well, I haven’t seen _you_ in a while,” Hongjoong greeted as he opened the door. Wooyoung hadn’t seen him in about two years and he definitely looked different, he had significantly more piercings and red hair. He looked hot as hell. 

Wooyoung had taken a confidence shot before leaving his parents house. 

“I missed you,” Wooyoung pouted at the older boy who just raised his eyebrows and laughed at him. “Can I come in? It’s really fucking cold.” Wooyoung whined. 

“I don’t remember texting you an invite,” Hongjoong said but opened the door wider to let Wooyoung in anyway. 

“You didn’t,” Wooyoung grinned, “Choi San invited me.” 

“Did he?” Hongjoong raised a singular brow, “Because from what I heard from San, you guys are not on the friendliest terms right now.” So, he told Hongjoong. That’s interesting. Wooyoung never remembered them being particularly close back in High School. 

“Is that what he said?” Wooyoung knew that was the truth but honestly it hurt a little. 

“Would you say differently?” Hongjoong asked and Wooyoung frowned a little, no he wouldn’t. That’s probably exactly what he would say. “Whatever, let’s go through.” Hongjoong quickly cuts that conversation and heads towards the door to the kitchen, 

Hongjoong stops for a second to turn around just before they reach the doorway, “Just don’t Wooyoung it.” he pleads and Wooyoung scoffs in disbelief. 

“You did not just call it ‘Wooyounging’ it,” Wooyoung exclaims and Hongjoong just winks at him before opening the door to hell. It wasn’t quite the big party of the year that Hongjoong used to throw but it wasn’t the small affair Wooyoung thought it was going to be. 

He doesn’t know whether he is grateful for this or not. 

Wooyoung’s eyes immediately find San who stood across the room with some people he vaguely remembers from school. Drink in hand, looking great, looking _happy._

“Are you going to say hi?” Hongjoong whispers directly into his ear and Wooyoung jumps back a little. The whispering was unnecessary, there was already loud indie music playing from the speakers to cover up any secretive conversations that may occur.

“Jesus,” Wooyoung holds a hand to his chest, “No, I don’t want to ruin his night.” He honestly couldn’t tear his eyes from the other boy, chatting and laughing carefree. 

“He said he loved you.” Hongjoong reminded softly and Wooyoung breathed shakily. “I don’t think you’re going to ruin his night.” Hongjoong chuckled a little and handed him a drink. 

“Loved.” Wooyoung remarked bitterly, “Exactly, past tense. Plus, I left him crying in the supermarket, he must think I was trying to get my revenge or something he most certainly does not want to hear anything from me.” Wooyoung chuckled before taking a long sip of his drink. 

Wooyoung winced, _what the hell had Hongjoong put in that?_

“Well then, what did you even come here for?” 

“Can I not just have missed you? Why does everything I do always have to have some kind of ulterior motive?” Wooyoung pouted at Hongjoong who just pet his head sympathetically. 

“No,” Hongjoong smiled at him, “Now, go talk to him before I push you into him.” Wooyoung just sighed in response,

“Okay, but only after I get a suitable dosage of liquid courage in my system.” He relents, Hongjoong rolls his eyes but starts pouring drinks for him. 

Wooyoung spent the next two hours consuming a lot more alcohol than could be justified as liquid courage. Hongjoong, thankfully, also consumed as much as Wooyoung and now was sat in the corner making out with a guy that Wooyoung didn’t recognise. 

This was great because it meant he couldn’t push him into San, but also bad because he couldn’t do that. Which meant that Wooyoung had to think of an excuse to talk to the other boy. 

So, drunk Wooyoung just stumbled along to where San was standing and speaking. “Hi,” Wooyoung leaned, very ungracefully, against the fridge and maybe Wooyoung was really out of it but San looked sort of amused. 

“Hello there,” San responded, not looking nearly as upset as Wooyoung thought he would be. He doesn’t know what to think about that. 

Wooyoung means to ask many things in the most sympathetic way he can, but he is unfortunately very inebriated so that does not go to plan, at all. “Do you want to get out of here?” San spits out his drink. Wooyoung still thinks he looks pretty. 

“Slow down there, soldier.” San chuckles, wiping his mouth. Wooyoung’s eyes widened in realisation. 

“Oh, no.” Wooyoung says, “No, no, no, no, not like that.” He laughs a little and falls over his feet a little grabbing San’s arm to stable himself. “Like do you want to talk? That’s what I meant.” He pointed at the other man as soon as he regained his stability. 

“Are we not talking now?” San asked, “Can we not continue this conversation here?” San seems a little wary, and Wooyoung can’t blame him, he would be wary too. 

“I just thought that fresh air, fresh minds and all that.” San chuckles, it’s a lovely sound. The nicest sound that Wooyoung had ever heard. 

“Is that one of the phrases they say in the city?” San teases and Wooyoung is too busy revelling in the sound of his laughter and the glow in his smile to respond immediately. It takes San clearing his throat for Wooyoung to realise that he had in fact been staring. 

“Oh, yeah?” It’s a question, honestly, he doesn’t even know what they were talking about anymore all he knows is _san san san san san._

“Let’s get you some of that fresh air you were talking about.” San takes him by his arm and starts to carefully lead him to the back door. Hongjoong manages to take a break from sucking face with the random goth man to raise his eyebrows suggestively at Wooyoung, who just salutes him in response. 

When they finally get to the garden Wooyoung frowns, “Damn this is the first song that I’ve recognised all night.” He complains, “Hongjoong has a stupid taste in music, little emo.” 

“I think this playlist has been heavily influenced by Hongjoong’s dick appointment.” Wooyoung snorts, San was really funny, the funniest. No wonder he was so easy to fall for. 

“You’re funny, you know that.” Wooyoung feels his head tilt, “Funny and pretty.” He thinks he whispered it but San’s lips twitch to mean that he can not have been as silent as he had hoped. 

“And you’re drunk.” 

“Not drunk, just a little more confident and honest.” Wooyoung felt he had to clarify. San did not look like he was convinced at all. “So, while I feel more confident and honest, I should apologise.” 

San opened his mouth to say something but was very quickly cut off, “Don’t say I have nothing to apologise for because I do.” 

“I’m sorry for not getting over my stupid crush on you and being a dick to you because of that when you wanted a fresh start and I’m also sorry for running away from you in a supermarket and spilling your milk.” San laughed a little and Wooyoung was confused, he was trying to be serious why was the other laughing at him. 

“That was your milk, not my milk.” 

Wooyoung frowned at him, “Are you serious? I am trying to apologise and you are fact-checking me?” Wooyoung tries to emphasise his words but doesn’t exactly succeed, he blames his distraction on San’s smile. 

“Wait,” Wooyoung comes to his senses, “You’re not going to bank this away in your Wooyoung’s drunk rambling folder are you?” San does not seem to be taking him seriously at all right now and Wooyoung does not think his sober self will manage to go through this conversation again.

San steps closer to him, “I thought you said you weren’t drunk,” The chill in the air combined with how close San was standing to him was sobering him up very quickly. Maybe. 

“I’m not.” Wooyoung whispers, “I didn’t think you believed me though,” He continued to whisper because San seemed impossibly close to him right now. 

“Well,” San whispered, entertained, “I do believe that you may be a little bit drunk.” Wooyoung leaned forward to hit his head off of San’s chest, which in hindsight was a terrible idea because now his head really fucking hurts. He moaned into his chest, this was so humiliating. 

“I meant it though,” He mumbled into his chest, San took him by the shoulders and moved him back so they were facing each other again, “What are you doing?” 

“Looking at you,” San answered and Wooyoung pouted at him, 

“If you’re going to reject me can you be quick about it? So I can go drown my sorrows,” He would either drag Hongjoong away from whoever he was occupied with or just raid through his alcohol collection and then cry in the bath. 

“Was that a confession?” 

Wooyoung rolled his eyes, “When I said I didn’t get over my crush on you,” Wooyoung said with a pointed look, “Yes that was a confession.” God, did the other man even hear a word of what he said. 

“Look,” San said pointing up, Wooyoung followed his finger, not without a sigh first. Why was he putting this off so much? Wooyoung can handle another rejection from him, okay maybe he couldn’t but he had various unhealthy coping mechanisms at the ready to get him through it. 

“Mistletoe,”

“Exactly,” San said and leaned in closer, Wooyoung’s eyes widened but he made no move to step back. 

“Does that mean you’re going to kiss me?” Wooyoung whispered once again. 

“Yes,” San rolled his eyes fondly at the boy, Wooyoung swallowed the lump in his throat, he was nervous. This was a big thing, their last kiss didn’t go too well and he was not in the mood to live through that again. 

“I heard,” Wooyoung spoke again as San inched closer, “that the mistletoe thing isn’t valid after Christmas,” Wooyoung’s eyes focused on San’s lips, they were great lips, actually. 

“Oh?” San whispered back, “Then can I just kiss you because I want to?” Wooyoung looked into San’s eyes, pretty eyes. The other boy stared back expectantly at him and he realised he was waiting on him replying. 

“I suppose,” Wooyoung whispered back. 

San smiled at him and Wooyoung closed his eyes as the other’s soft lips met his own. They were cold and sort of chapped, but despite this Wooyoung felt extremely warm. 

This warmth only lasted three seconds before his lips were met with cold air again, Wooyoung opened his eyes, confused. 

“Is that it?” He thought aloud and San laughed at him, for what seems the 100th time this evening. 

“That’s all,” Wooyoung opens his mouth to complain but, “For now. Maybe we could do that again when you are sober and maybe somewhere that’s not Hongjoong’s house when it’s freezing outside?” San asks, grabbing the other boy’s hand. 

“I think I’d like that.” Wooyoung smiled at him. 

_(and maybe Wooyoung spends the rest of the night stealing kisses from San’s lips, not that San minded it too much)_

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, i hope u enjoyed :p 
> 
> pls feel free to check me out on twitter or leave me a cc


End file.
